Who am i?

I would'nt say i have a very interesting life, definitely not worth and autobiography if that's what this is. I am a 20 year old trans girl in canada, i currently work full time in a fast food and in my free time i generally play video games on work on projects such as this one.
i spend a ridiculous ammount of time on unity working within the vrchat sdk to shape my virtual identity endlessly, i rip and steal other peoples avatar and edit them as much as i can to make them more my own.
then i take pictures of my crimes and post it to social media to show off my work.
talking about work.
i like my work, havent been there for very long, only a few weeks as of 9/8/2024
i enjoy making food and drinks for other people and having them be thankful for it near every time, it's challenging and even somewhat fulfilling even though i know my work isnt necessarily very important.

i was very scared to work here, i've always been scared of most things but lately things havent been so scary anymore, i've struggled with crippling anxiety for as long as i can remember and always thought that i would trade a limb to get rid of it on a heartbeat but it doesnt feel like that would be the case very much anymore. things arent sunshine and rainbows still, i always suffer more than i let on, simply because i dont feel like adressing all those issues now would really fix or help anything.
getting on anti depressants and getting people who i feel support and love me in my life has surely helped with all this, though i would'nt credit anyone other than myself for anything, it's always been that way, im playing this game solo.

the only reason i got the job is because of an ultimatum that was presented to me at one point, i either had to do full time school or full time work and i personally cannot stand school at all and so i chose work, my vr headset conveniently broke days before and i obviously didnt have the money to fix it, having been a neet for years until recently xd

what's with the whole dog thing?
puppygirls in the trans community are pretty rampant, for me though its been a thing for a little longer, i think just my autism and anxiety have led me to have dog-like behavior and stims which i guess ive just embraced with time, some unmasking may have gone on, i kinda hate that word tho. loud noises scare me, i like to bark a lot :33 im anxiously attached to my owner, i only feel comfortable being treated like an animal and given orders, it's what feels natural to me. i've felt like cattle for most my life and i guess now i turned out a dog.
ive also been a part/adjacent to the furry community since i was about 12 years old, you can guess how that went..

my name?
I mostly go by Rose, i also like going by Blair and sometimes Gabriel, it all depends on where i find myself on the gender spectrum on any given day, i only ever go by she/it but i wouldnt settle on any particular label for what my actual gender is, its very fluid you could say

owner?

you can see pics of us in the photo album whenever i get around to posting them~

i think thats all for now, i may write more when i think of something♥